{"id":13,"date":"2016-05-02T10:09:21","date_gmt":"2016-05-02T14:09:21","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/grownwomanflow.com\/?p=13"},"modified":"2016-05-02T10:09:21","modified_gmt":"2016-05-02T14:09:21","slug":"insecurities","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/grownwomanflow.com\/index.php\/2016\/05\/02\/insecurities\/","title":{"rendered":"Insecurities"},"content":{"rendered":"

\u201cYou\u2019re fat\u201d\u00a0 \u201cYou\u2019re ugly\u201d \u201cYou wear Bo-Bos\/off brand clothes\/shoes\u201d \u201cYou\u2019re too dark\u201d \u201cYou\u2019re too light\u201d \u201cYou have nappy hair\u201d \u201cYou\u2019re too tall\/short\u201d \u201cYou\u2019re poor\u201d \u201cNobody likes you\u201d<\/strong><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/strong>So very many times, we sit and think \u201cWhy don\u2019t they like me\u201d? \u201cWhy is he with her and not me\u201d? \u201cIs it my hair, my clothes, my make-up\u201d? \u201cWhy am I not good enough\u201d?\u00a0 These questions are your insecurities screaming at you the insignificant things that destroy your ego and self-confidence.\u00a0\u00a0 We have all questioned ourselves at some point in our lives because there will always be someone prettier\/more handsome, someone with more money, better clothes, a nicer home, even a better disposition.\u00a0 Now, this is not to say you are not great and have a lot going for you, you do, but there will just always<\/strong> be someone with more.<\/p>\n

The worst part of insecurities is we don\u2019t always acknowledge that we have them, we tend to lash out at others\u2019 shortcomings in hopes no one will notice ours.\u00a0 Ummmmm, how does that help anyone?\u00a0 One of the toughest parts of an insecurity is we don\u2019t always know how or when it came to be.\u00a0 Think back, who\u2019s the first person who called you fat?\u00a0 Or told you that you weren\u2019t smart enough to go to this or that school?\u00a0 Or your clothes aren\u2019t good enough?\u00a0 A seed was planted SOMEwhere but we accepted it as something being wrong with it and we\u2019ve worn it so long, it\u2019s become a part of us.\u00a0 Most of us are very unaware of how a seed planted long ago is affecting every relationship in our present day as well as those in our past.\u00a0 Most of us have also been victims of those who haven\u2019t acknowledged their long ago planted seeds and it\u2019s destroyed us and our hearts because we tried to love and be there for them since we felt no one else had ever been.\u00a0 Insecurities can stem from so many various places, from having your parent leave you and never have an interest in spending any time with you to a sibling who didn\u2019t appreciate you being born and taking what they deemed as their spotlight.\u00a0 The reason someone chooses to break your confidence is, unfortunately, usually never discussed, dealt with and healed so both parties can grow and be better.\u00a0 Instead, we tear each other down with our words and actions because we feel inferior to them for something beyond their control.\u00a0 No one can control their skin complexion, eye color (well, in this day and age, you can buy them but still), hair texture, height or body shape yet, there are many who judge and criticize others for these features.\u00a0 I may have missed something in the womb because I don\u2019t recall seeing a panel for me to choose my appearance while I was in there.<\/p>\n

As we grow biologically, we carry these insecurities someone else has given us, everything from the little girl in first grade who made fun of your shoes to the little boy who made fun of your hair or skin color to even the family member who criticized your laugh.\u00a0 These little, simple things affect you in ways you don\u2019t understand unless you take the time to deal with issues that will arise later in life affecting the way you handle every relationship from romantic, friendship and even familial.<\/p>\n

I know that I\u2019m not the only one that has been in a relationship with someone that had unacknowledged insecurities, there\u2019s no way possible.\u00a0 For many of us, we don\u2019t recognize their insecurities as theirs due to the way they are presented.\u00a0 Ever been with someone and all of a sudden you dress like a whore even though it\u2019s no different than when you met nor is it even actually revealing?\u00a0 No? Ever been picked apart in every facet of your existence, like, you can\u2019t even sweep the floor correctly?\u00a0 Believe it or not, this has absolutely nothing to do with you and how you dress or sweep, it has to do with the other person\u2019s insecurities within themselves.\u00a0 In a way, you can take it as a compliment of sorts because this person thinks you are so fabulous they don\u2019t deserve you at that level and do what they have to break you down to their level.\u00a0 Yeah, I said \u201cof sorts\u201d because it\u2019s not truly a compliment if it breaks your spirit.\u00a0 \u00a0The most hurtful comments come from those we love and trust the most and that\u2019s why they are able to do the most damage, we believe they want nothing but the best for us so, we follow their lead and change who we are to gain their approval.\u00a0 This mindset doesn\u2019t just pertain to romantic relationships, friendships and the relationships you have with other family members can provide the same result.\u00a0 Many bitter, angry people are just broken children who never understood there was nothing wrong with them and grew up still damaged, carrying it forward and taking out on others.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

\u201cYou\u2019re fat\u201d\u00a0 \u201cYou\u2019re ugly\u201d \u201cYou wear Bo-Bos\/off brand clothes\/shoes\u201d \u201cYou\u2019re too dark\u201d \u201cYou\u2019re too light\u201d \u201cYou have nappy hair\u201d \u201cYou\u2019re too tall\/short\u201d \u201cYou\u2019re poor\u201d \u201cNobody likes you\u201d \u00a0So very many times, we sit and think \u201cWhy don\u2019t they like me\u201d? \u201cWhy is he with her and not me\u201d? \u201cIs it my hair, my clothes, my … Continue reading “Insecurities”<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":14,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"image","meta":{"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_feature_clip_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":false,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2},"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-13","post","type-post","status-publish","format-image","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-uncategorized","post_format-post-format-image"],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/p7va7x-d","jetpack_likes_enabled":true,"jetpack_featured_media_url":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/grownwomanflow.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2016\/05\/Good-enough2.jpg?fit=416%2C415&ssl=1","_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/grownwomanflow.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/13","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/grownwomanflow.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/grownwomanflow.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/grownwomanflow.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/grownwomanflow.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=13"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/grownwomanflow.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/13\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":15,"href":"https:\/\/grownwomanflow.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/13\/revisions\/15"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/grownwomanflow.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/14"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/grownwomanflow.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=13"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/grownwomanflow.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=13"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/grownwomanflow.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=13"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}