{"id":249,"date":"2017-02-20T12:49:44","date_gmt":"2017-02-20T17:49:44","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/grownwomanflow.com\/?p=249"},"modified":"2017-02-20T12:49:44","modified_gmt":"2017-02-20T17:49:44","slug":"happiness-is-priceless","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/grownwomanflow.com\/index.php\/2017\/02\/20\/happiness-is-priceless\/","title":{"rendered":"Happiness is Priceless"},"content":{"rendered":"

Look at your Boo, they are fine, spark your soul and make you smile just by seeing their face, this is your end all be all of a partner. You click on every level and you feel complete when you are with them and empty when they\u2019re not around.\"RelatedAfter some time, reality begins to set in and problems will arise within the relationship but you both get thru them with communication and you still believe this is forever. But alas, it\u2019s not, there are problems no amount of communication are able to overcome. You know in your heart and soul it\u2019s over but you stick around because your momma didn\u2019t raise a quitter and you don\u2019t want to hurt this person. Staying in a relationship after it\u2019s already over and you\u2019re done actually causes more damage to the both of you than ending it when you were both healthy. Now, this person who once looked at you with nothing but adoration and love saves the most painful stank eyes strictly for you.\"Image You\u2019re no longer in a relationship because there is so much disdain and loathing you each do things to drive the other person further away so you can be the bad guy. Why did you stay?<\/p>\n

The main reason I hear for people staying in miserable relationships is: the children. Hmmm, that\u2019s never a good, legitimate or healthy reason to stay with someone who is now sucking every bit of goodness out of your soul. We don\u2019t realize how resilient children truly are, we believe they are so fragile and we are messing up their lives if we are no longer with this person they\u2019ve grown fond of. The person you are ending a relationship with is not always necessarily the other half of their beginning, it could be a boyfriend\/girlfriend they got used to be around. You sacrifice your happiness and sanity because you are afraid of removing someone from their lives. Here\u2019s my question to you: How would you feel if your child\/children were in the same type of relationship you\u2019re in for them? You won\u2019t be the best person or even parent you can and should be if you\u2019re miserable. Trust me, I\u2019ve been there and learned the hard way but refuse to repeat that cycle, my girls and I deserve the best me at all times.<\/p>\n

When I meet someone who is married or in a serious relationship, I ask them one simple question: Are you happy? I\u2019m amazed how that one simple question changes their demeanor and expression. Prior to asking the question, they are light-hearted and having a good time, you can even see a sparkle in their eye, life looks good for them\u2026\u2026\u2026\u2026..on the outside. Once that question is posed, the light in their eyes dim and the misery is shown on their face and I have my answer before they can even utter a lie.\"Image I don\u2019t know about most of you but at this point in my life, I want and settle for nothing less than happiness.<\/p>\n

How happy are you if you do whatever you can not to be home with them? Don\u2019t get me wrong, I understand and encourage everyone to maintain their own identity within a relationship, it\u2019s crucial or you get lost and sacrifice who you are for the sake of being in that relationship. Maybe I just have a different ideal of what a relationship is, maybe I\u2019m the anomaly here. When I was married, there was NO way my husband would be hanging out 4-5 nights a week, coming home intoxicated after midnight. But there are some who feel they need to be buzzed to go home and deal with life. \"ImageIf your home life is truly that good and happy, why aren\u2019t you spending more time there? Did I lose myself during my marriage? Yes, I most certainly did because I thought that\u2019s what I was supposed to do and it took me a lot longer than it should have to realize how wrong I was. I now know, understand and respect there is a healthy balance between hanging out and socializing with friends and spending time with your Boo.<\/p>\n

Another reason people will stay in a relationship is for financial and materialistic reasons. They are with this person because they wouldn\u2019t have the big house or cash flow to buy extravagant clothes, shoes, and purses without them.\"Image I\u2019ve heard so many times how complicated it is due to sharing a house or business with their partner so they stay and do whatever they want as though they\u2019re single. What makes you think you can\u2019t have all of that without them? If you\u2019re staying in a relationship for Louis Vutton, you\u2019re in it for the wrong reasons and your soul will never rest easy. All of the items you\u2019re able to purchase is not love or commitment to that person, it\u2019s only satisfying a shallowness within you and that won\u2019t last no matter how big your house or bank account is. For me, being with the person I love and loves me means so much more than money. Believe it or not, when you\u2019re in a relationship for the right reasons, all of those things will actually come easy.Again, I guess I\u2019m an anomaly in this area as well. I watched those I love have everything materialistic they could ever want but they were miserable and the relationship didn\u2019t last because enough couldn\u2019t be bought to make them happy. I learned never to sacrifice my soul for any amount of money.<\/p>\n

Some people will stay in dead relationships because they feel this is what they\u2019re supposed to do, where they\u2019re supposed to be in life, regardless of their level of happiness. These people will get into a relationship with someone who doesn\u2019t spark their soul because they are terrified of getting hurt again. This person was deeply in love with someone and it scared them so bad they refused to ever let anyone that close again. They seek someone who looks good on their arm, represents them well by not being ratchet in public and are good with their children but also not have the ability to get in that place of their heart they hold sacred. At this point, you\u2019re not in love, you\u2019re merely content with saying you have someone in your life as to not be alone. Fear is a terrible thing which prevents you from living a happy and full life. What\u2019s the worst that could happen if you actually did stay with the person who ignited your heart as no one before them ever did? Answer? You could live the happiest life ever imagined but you\u2019ve now missed out on it to settle for mediocrity with someone you haven\u2019t that true connection with. Way to go!\"Image<\/p>\n

I am a single divorcee\u2019 who looks forward to getting married again. I know too many people who are stuck in dead end, miserable relationships for all sorts of reasons. I am an advocate for love and happiness in relationships, in no way am I a relationship killer or hater. I just believe everyone should be happy, that\u2019s why we\u2019re here, to find and live in our happiness.\"Image\u00a0When I was having doubts and questions about my marriage, believing it was what I was supposed to do because it was GOD\u2019S ideal, my cousin said something which changed my whole outlook and understanding: GOD never meant for you to live a life of misery. I can and do want happiness for everyone but I can never want it more for you than you\u2019re willing to want it for yourself.<\/p>\n

I love and believe in love but am also very aware of the many who settle for less just to say they have someone, a big house or their children are used to this other person. Life is too short to stay in a miserable, dead end relationship. Will you hurt by ending this relationship? Yes, but you\u2019ll heal and have so much more than you ever dream of by allowing them and yourself to find your true happiness outside of each other. We have to love ourselves more in order to love and let another in and build a life together. A contented and fulfilled heart is visible on the outside as well as in. \"ImageWhen you’re happy, you’ll never have to actually tell anyone, you’ll emit it in every action and facial expression and it’s contagious. Go on out there and start infecting others with your joy, love and happiness!<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Look at your Boo, they are fine, spark your soul and make you smile just by seeing their face, this is your end all be all of a partner. You click on every level and you feel complete when you are with them and empty when they\u2019re not around.After some time, reality begins to set … Continue reading “Happiness is Priceless”<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":253,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_feature_clip_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":true,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2},"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-249","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-uncategorized"],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/p7va7x-41","jetpack_likes_enabled":true,"jetpack_featured_media_url":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/grownwomanflow.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2017\/02\/be-happy-e1487612872108.jpg?fit=150%2C225&ssl=1","_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/grownwomanflow.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/249","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/grownwomanflow.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/grownwomanflow.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/grownwomanflow.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/grownwomanflow.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=249"}],"version-history":[{"count":2,"href":"https:\/\/grownwomanflow.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/249\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":252,"href":"https:\/\/grownwomanflow.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/249\/revisions\/252"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/grownwomanflow.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/253"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/grownwomanflow.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=249"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/grownwomanflow.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=249"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/grownwomanflow.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=249"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}