The Most Precious, Priceless Gift

LOVE. What is love? Well, it’s the strongest emotion we experience and the one we have absolutely no control over. Our other emotions may seem stronger but they aren’t and are, to a degree, controllable. Take fear for example, if you face your fears, they have no control over you at all. If you’re afraid of spiders, don’t run the next time you see one, you far outweigh a spider and can crush them into dust with a simple stomp of your foot. Anger is another emotion we can control if we choose to, yes, it is a choice whether you get angry or not. There will be situations where you have the option to either fly off the handle and kirk all the way out, yelling, cursing and screaming at the top of your lungs or keep a level head and remain calm. Image result for tyra yelling gifNever give another the satisfaction of stooping to their level and hoot and holler over something they said which you didn’t agree with, it’s not worth your energy or sanity. Love isn’t that easy to control and that’s why it scares so many of us, we’re used to being in control and love doesn’t abide by that. Love is a little reckless because it knows what you need even when you don’t.

One of the simplest ways I can describe the feeling of love is to remember when I gave birth to my daughters. The emotion I felt at that moment was deeper than anything I had ever experienced in my life and all I could do was cry. I knew at that moment there would be nothing I wouldn’t do for those precious beings. Image result for childbirth gifI have been blessed, some will say cursed, to feel that deeply for another outside of my children. To me, it’s a blessing to love another so deeply, not because they asked me to but because I wanted to. Love is not something you ask someone to do for you, it’s a choice they make within themselves to do for and share with you. Love is gentle, love is kind, love is patient and love is unconditional when given in its purest form. Loving without condition is the only way I know how, some will consider this to be a major flaw but I embrace it for the blessing it truly is. Love is my disease.

When describing a situation I was in some time ago, I was told “Your mind is playing tricks on you” and was quite confused as to what they meant. They went on to explain that your mind has no place in matters of the heart because love is not logical and you can’t surpass feelings of love by using logic. People will use logic to say why they should or shouldn’t be with this person or that person, trying to ignore their hearts at the same time. Let me ‘splain something to you, what your heart feels will never be ignored, no matter how much you smoke, party, drink or sleep around with other people. Image result for heartbroken gifWhen your heart belongs to someone else, until that is acknowledged and dealt with, you’ll settle for subpar, mediocre relationships with others because your heart is not whole nor is it connecting on that deep level. No one, no matter how much they care for you, can tell you what to do with your heart, the love you share with and feel for another is between you and that other person, no one else. There will be times those around you may question why you love who you do and suggest you give up and find someone they believe will be more suitable for you. That’s hilarious because no one outside of GOD knows you, your heart and who is meant for you.

Unfortunately, there are so many who’ve never experienced unconditional love shared with them by another, therefore, they don’t really understand or appreciate it for the gift is actually is. You know the type of person I’m referring to, the one who’s had multiple relationships but never had a true connection with someone. This person is always doing for their Boo and receiving nothing in return except an extended hand expecting more and more be done for them. Image result for spoiled gifThen, you come into their lives and just want to love and be there for them without expectation of what they can do for you, they get scared and make up irrelevant excuses as to why the 2 of you can’t be together. They will never admit they are scared of this unfamiliar feeling, they’ll do whatever they can to justify their actions, hurting you in the process because all you wanted to do was to show them what unconditional love felt like. Image result for heartbroken gifThis same person will continue to get involved with other people who they know have no chance of actually reaching and holding a significant place in their heart, they opt for what feels ‘safe’. When they choose for safety, they aren’t loving, they are merely existing and feel they’re doing the right thing because, in their mind, they are in a relationship. All they are really doing is wasting the time of both parties involved because neither has the option or chance to move on to find the one who will protect, nurture and treasure their love and heart with kindness, patience, and care.

Thru the trials and tribulations of a relationship, we start to feel stupid for loving someone we feel may not love us as deeply. You can’t compare or critique how someone else loves you, we all show our love differently. Here’s an example: the way I show love is to do for others, be their shoulder to cry on, there for them in every capacity, doing whatever I can to make their life easier and more stress free, this is me. Now, the person I’m involved with could show their love by making sure I worry about nothing materialistically or financially, they will work themselves like a slave without papers just to make sure I don’t want for anything. The disconnect comes into play if neither of us recognize the other’s actions. I could get in my feelings and say he doesn’t love me as deeply because he’d rather work than spend time with me and he could get in his feelings because he believes his efforts are going unappreciated and taken for granted. If there is no communication and understanding, both hearts will get broken and possible resentment will grow. Image result for broken hearts gifWith communication, a happy medium will always prevail and your hearts will continue to flourish with love for one another.

I’ve said it before and I will continue to say it: Never feel stupid for loving someone, it is a gift denied many. Image result for heartbroken gifThe saddest thing I have ever witnessed and experienced is being in love with someone and not being able to, for whatever reason, be with them. Yes, life would be so much easier if we were able to pick and choose who we love and have our love mirrored in our partner but it’s not that simple. If people were truthful with themselves, there’d be much less heartache, heartbreak, pain, bitterness, and misery in the world. But, alas, love scares too many for this to be a reality. Sometimes we have to go thru the pain of love and loss to grow and be prepared for the one truly meant for us. If you hadn’t gone thru so much shit with the last one, you wouldn’t be able to appreciate the goodness of the next one.

You owe it to yourself and those who come into your life to understand what a priceless gift love is. Never take for granted the love another shares with you because you have no idea how much it took for them to open up enough to let you in. When you accept the love another gives you without reciprocity, you are now abusing their love and that’s cruel beyond measure. Take the time to nurture your own love before sharing with another so they’re able to receive it in its most pure and genuine format. It’s time we all take a chance and let love be our disease.Image result for unconditional love gif

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